Wandering Thoughts: This Is Me Talking Myself Out of Writing Mean Reviews

Image: Kaboompics

Wandering Thoughts is where I let my mind stray, think and talk about non-routine things. This is an avenue for bookish personal stories, fun posts, musings and discussions.


It’s the end of a long day. You are really looking forward to some nice and quiet reading. You get yourself some snacks and drinks then settle on your favorite reading nook. You pick up a book that you’ve been wanting to check out and expects to have a good time. Plot twist: you did not have a good time. The book is bad, in ways you couldn’t have imagined possible. The plot is slow and the characters are dry. Halfway through, your brain is screaming for you to stop and just drop the book. But you  trudged on thinking that it can get better. Of course the universe is cruel because the book didn’t get better. Upon finishing the whole thing and turning the last page, your initial reaction is mild irritation. And then you remembered how excited you were looking forward to reading it and then it turned out to be garbage. You felt betrayed. You want to cry. And then you realized you lost something you will never get back: precious reading time. Plus the book cost you money. You wanna pull out your hair in frustration. Your blood vessels are bulging and your heart is pounding fast to keep up with the build up of negative emotions inside. Whatever happened to bibliotherapy, right?


This is your fault. Out of all the books in your TBR pile, why did you choose this one in the first place? Then when there is nothing happening on the pages, your brain told you to DNF it but you did not listen. Maybe you are just plain stupid. NO YOU’RE NOT! THAT’S HORRIBLE! How could you say that to yourself? How could you have ever known beforehand that you will not like this book? You love reading this genre. You saw positive reviews of this book in Goodreads. You are not in the wrong from expecting that this book is the bomb. I get it now, yes! Maybe the good reviews you saw are all lies. And the truth is that this thing you are holding is misery incarnated in the form of a book. It ruins every thing. You should burn it and blame its author for the damaged it caused you. This book made you hate reading. You will not recover from this trauma. For sure you will spend all your remaining days in a reading slump.


Someone should take responsibility for this. What’s the best way to take revenge? Ah perfect, you should write the meanest of mean reviews. A mean review that will make them feel your pain and aggravation. Oh good, make it intense and in shouty caps. Tell the author all the hurtful words like “IMBECILE”, “IGNORANT”, and “YOU KNOW NOTHING!” Don’t forget to sprinkle expletives to get your point across. Lash out like your life depended on it. Type all your dissatisfaction away and be the keyboard warrior you are always destined to be.


Congratulations, self! You have launched a personal vendetta on the book and it’s author who cause you pain. Don’t forget to look down on the readers who liked the book because they are tasteless and have no right to their own reading preferences. Go extra and attack the publisher for allowing such a despicable book on the shelves. Maybe you should rally the reading community to boycott the book. Go on social media and propagate hate. Really classy, Regina George of book blogging! Is this what you really want? Why don’t you back up a little bit before hitting that publish button? Would you really feel happy doing all these things in anger? Is the world a better place after you’ve spewed all those mean things in the open? Is there no other way of doing this without being a bully? You know you are better than that. Let your boiling anger simmer. Allow yourself to rein in your emotions. It’s true that this book hurt you but you are in-charge of how you will react. Take deep breaths and just straight-up say what’s wrong with the book then backspace on all the unnecessary sass and snark. Even if your review is negative, you may still say it kindly. Choose to review through constructive criticisms instead of derogatory remarks. Repeat after me: honest but kind. Make this your book reviewing mantra. And from now on, just as how you proofread your reviews for grammar, typo errors and spelling mistakes, make it a point to also weed out the rude words. Remember: HONEST BUT KIND.

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